Holly Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
by Voldivoice
Summary: AU: Harry was born Holly. The Girl-Who-Lived has just survived the Tri-Wizard tournament, Voldemort has risen, the public don't believe her, and now Occlumency lessons with Snape! How will Holly survive 5th year? Possible HP/SS AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling does, and she's a very wealthy woman because of it!**

**Authors Note: I know a female Harry has been done, but I wanted to experiment with the changes that would occur if Harry was Holly, how she would differ personality-wise, and in particular, how Snape would react to a Potter with Lily's face, and not necessarily in a romantic way, I haven't decided yet. All pairings canon apart from Harry/Holly!**

It does not do to dwell on dreams

_Holly Potter was in the graveyard again, she and Cedric raised their wands to light up the supposedly deserted area, they moved cautiously away from the trophy that had brought them there. Then came the short figure in the distance, then the voice "kill the spare", the flash of green light, and Cedric silently fell to the ground. Holly felt her mouth open in a silent scream._

Holly was awakened from her disturbed sleep by a soft but insistent tapping at her window. She shakily pushed her mountain of black curls from her eyes and squinted at her bedside table to find her glasses. Sliding them on the mausoleum of broken objects that was her room at Privet Drive came into sharper focus. She'd had the dream again; she didn't want to remember what happened that night. Sometimes Holly wished that she'd already learned to obliviate, she would have used it on herself. Thinking about the Tri-Wizard tournament brought a wave of nausea to Holly that she couldn't shake off, and she welcomed the sight of her owl, Hedwig, waiting impatiently at her window to be allowed entrance.

Letting Hedwig in she noted the packages that she was laden with, and looking at Dudley's digital clock, the date read the 00:12, the 31st of July, she was 15. Holly helped Hedwig to the perch in her cage and sat down on her bed with the letters from Ron and Hermione, and the packages with what were most likely her presents. She hadn't heard a useful word from them all summer, and she was quote resentful of these presents when they had refused to tell her anything of where they were, and they were obviously together.

She'd even taken to hiding in the flowers by the front room window to catch the evening news, which Uncle Vernon had been very displeased about when he caught her there. Nevertheless, there was a chance that they were finally sending her something important, and so she eagerly ripped open the letters, and first read the one from Hermione.

_Dear Holly_

_Happy 15__th__ Birthday! I'm sorry I can't talk about where we are but most likely we'll be able to speak sooner than you think. _

Trust Hermione to splice secrecy with a smattering of hope.

_Things are very busy here, but I spotted in Mrs Weasley's Witch Weekly that St Mungo's have released a new Occu-Potion that acts just like a regular muggle contact lense! _

Hermione, while sceptical of the publication due to its insistence that Holly and Ron were in some kind of illicit relationship last term, raved about an article that had been in _Potion's Monthly_ stating that the "_temporary corrective affects of the potion had been known to last up to a month in test subjects, and as far there were no foreseeable long term side effects_".

Although the potion was safe, Holly was still wary of invasive magical procedures, especially since re-growing all the bones in her arm in second year thanks to Lockhart. But then again from what Hermione said in the letter the potion was a temporary solution, and although it cost quite a few galleons a month it would be worth it not to be dependent on glass and wire to walk in a straight line.

_So I hope you like your present and I can't wait to see the results! _

_Hope to be seeing you soon_

_Love_

_Hermione_

Holly, now with a good idea of what Hermione had gotten her, opened the neatly wrapped package to reveal a months supply of Healer Chadwicks Occu-Potion, proven to correct eyesight for up to one month with repeated doses. Hermione had even left the cut-out advertisement with subscription details in case she decided to continue buying it. She was quite amused by the moving picture of a dowdy looking witch in huge spectacles drinking the potion and then becoming far more attractive without them. She doubted make-overs were one of the side effects.

Placing the bottle carefully on the side for later use, she turned to Ron's letters. It was in a far messier script than Hermione's flowing cursive, but contained the same ambiguous platitudes.

_Hey mate!_

_Happy Birthday! Can't really talk about what's going on here, but Mum said that you were a "young lady now" and so a broom kit wasn't an "appropriate" gift. So she made send you these skin and hair potions (I've got the broom kit stashed here from Fred, George and me for when I see you). _

Trust Ron to stay on her side for this matter, Mrs Weasley was in the habit of treating her like a delicate flower, even to the point of raving about her "beautiful" long curly hair and insisting she brush it, and force feeder third helping of treacle tart. Not that Holly particularly minded this attention; she's never really had a female role model growing up. The most Aunt Petunia had ever done was give her the "Woman" talk when she was twelve, and take her to the pharmacy to get feminine products. All the clothes she had gotten were second hand from Petunia herself, or charity shops. Well at least they were until she discovered she was a Witch, and had kitted herself out with all the clothes she needed from a delighted saleswoman at Debenhams.

Still it was nice to be treated with concern, and even affection, by an older woman; she'd always love Mrs Weasley for holding her on that hospital wing bed after the Tri-Wizard. But she wasn't going to think about that.

Turning back to the letter Ron wished her a happy birthday again, and said that he's be seeing her soon, whatever that meant.

Holly looked at the clock again, 00:30, she should really try and get some sleep, looking at the Occu-Potion again, and she read the label that said to take it before bed. Holly took off her glasses, lay down, and placed the three drops recommended in each eye.

The potion stung, but Holly welcomed the distraction from her thoughts, because she knew that the moment she fell asleep, she'd be back in that graveyard.

**Authors Note: Please Read and Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**Authors Note: I hope you like the premise so far, here's the second chapter!**

Dudley Demented

The next week was definitely an experience for Holly; it was so strange to be able to see everything without the weight of her glasses on her nose. When Aunt Petunia had seen her on the first day she had stared, looking at her as if she'd seen a ghost, before snapping out of it and ordering her to prune the roses in the front garden.

She had received a note from Sirius to "stay out of trouble" and she had tried to do that, even going so far as trying all the hair and skin products Ron had sent in order to waste time, and keep her mind off the seething anger she felt due to her entrapment. She'd not spent this much time on her hair and skin since she went to the Yule Ball with Dean Thomas, well, Hermione had made her.

Going inside after pruning the roses, she had stared at herself in the bathroom mirror, she wasn't vein in the least but looking at the smoothness that products had brought to her curls, and the spot free complexion the potion had given her, she couldn't help feeling slightly better about herself. If she was a mess on the inside, it didn't have to show on the outside.

What she hadn't bargained on was the attention it would attract from Dudley's gang of hoodlums, and it wasn't the normal kind. They had taken to prowling the streets to beat up the smaller children, and whenever Holly had crossed their path it had led to some sexually charged heckling that Dudley had not been all that happy about. Holly may be a freak, but deep down Dudley still knew that they were cousins and his friends flirting with his cousin was not okay. So in his own way he was trying to divert the attention, by insulting Holly in front of his friends in every way possible. It had made Holly both touched and angry at the same time, but she had promised herself she would keep a low profile, if only for Sirius's sake.

After a week of these changes, it was Dudley's turn to host his gang for dinner, which consisted of them eating and talking obnoxiously before going out again to terrorise the neighbourhood. So Holly took this as her opportunity to go out for a walk unmolested. She did her usual route, up Wisteria walk towards the children's park that at 9pm was deserted, and settled herself on the swings.

She'd never really gotten the opportunity to enjoy the park as a child, whenever Aunt Petunia took Dudley she often got left at Old Mrs Figg's, and although Holly liked cats to this day she cringed slightly when she heard Mrs Figg call them in at night. Holly sat pushing herself slowly on the swing, feeling the wind moving her waist length curls around, and watching the sun starting to descend over the horizon of uniform houses and gardens.

Holly spent her time trying to think of nothing, not her relatives, or her experience in the graveyard, she tried to empty herself of everything, of herself, because if she was empty then she wouldn't have to remember. After what seemed like minutes she heard footsteps approaching on the gravel path, opening her eyes she was surprised to see the sun had set, and all that lit the playground were the occasional streetlight and the waning moon. To her surprise it was Dudley, looking rather chagrined, who stomped up to her and blurted:

"Mum said to come get you as no moral girl should be out at this hour on her own and you could be up to God knows what. She doesn't want the neighbours talking about you, it looks bad."

Holly rolled her eyes, she didn't care what the neighbours thought, but it was better to avoid an argument, especially when she had promised Sirius not to cause a stir. She slid off the swing and zipped up her red and yellow hoodie, a tribute to Gryffindor. She and Dudley slowly began making their way back, and did so silently before Dudley started taunting her.

"So why are you out so late, you afraid to go to bed?"

Holly stopped and stared at him, they had reached the corner of Wisteria, only one street away from Privet Drive.

"What are you on about?" she questioned.

Dudley looked smug, and went in for the kill "I hear you, at night, crying, "Mum, Dad, he's going to kill me Mum! He's killed Cedric!" Who's Cedric, your boyfriend?"

Cold ran down Holly's spine, "Shut up! You don't know anything!"

Dudley kept going: "If you weren't already a freak, now you're crazy, that Cedric probably killed himself to get away from you"

Holly had had enough, and drew her want from her hoodie pocket pointing it directly at Dudley.

At that moment, the streetlights began to flicker, and the air around them became frigidly cold.

"Stop it, Mum said you can't, Stop!" screamed Dudley

"Shut up! I'm not doing this!" She yelled back.

Then Holly saw the dark shapes coming towards them, and her breath turned to icicles, she was back in the graveyard, she was alone, and she was screaming, wait...she wasn't alone, it wasn't her screaming, it was Dudley!

Holly snapped out of her trance to see Dudley being descended upon by a ghoulish dementor, screaming and shaking as it opened its mouth.

Holly pointed her wand and desperately tried to think of something happy, but all her joy had been sapped away. Ron and Hermione had gone off in their own clique, Dumbledore had forgotten her, and Sirius...SIRIUS! With thoughts of her Godfather in her mind she summoned up all her strength and cast the spell:

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

The familiar doe came forth from her wand; the one Professor Lupin had said was the perfect female counterpart to her father's animagus form, and charged down both Dementors. Dudley collapsed to the ground.

Holly ran to Dudley and knelt by him, lowering her wand in the process.

"Don't lower your wand girl there may be more of them!"

Harry pointed her want reflexively at the figure of Mrs Figg, her old baby-sitter, who hobbled forward with a shopping bag full of cat food.

"Mrs Figg?"

"Yes dear, quick, get him up, you can't stay here, get up you big oaf! Oh I'm going to kill Mundungus Fletcher!"

**Authors Note: Please read and review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**Authors Note: Let's move on with this show! Hope you're liking it so far!**

Grimmauld Place

Upon their slow return to the house Mrs Figg explained that she in fact a squib who was working for Dumbledore, and had been tasked with watching Holly. Holly felt quite disgruntled that she had been spied on her whole life, especially as Mrs Figg had made it such an unpleasant process, even if she had apologised.

Upon entering 4 Privet Drive she had been shouted at by both Vernon and Petunia, despite the fact that Holly had managed to drag Dudley home, who was taller than her 5 ft 6 and easily 5 times her weight. It had been compounded by the subsequent letter from the ministry announcing her expulsion, her Uncles demands she leave, the letters from Mr Weasley and Sirius demanding she stay put, and then another letter from the Ministry saying she had a reprieve and stating a court date, and the puzzling Howler from Professor Dumbledore addressed to her aunt, stating to remember "his last".

Holly was peeved with all the mixed messages and misinformation being fed to her, she was 15 she was old enough to know what was going on! She'd wrecked her room in her frustration, having been locked in by her Uncles, and subsequently tidied, packed, unpacked, and then repacked all her belongings. No matter what anyone said, at the first opportunity she was getting out of here, head to the Burrow or Diagon Alley, she was so mad she couldn't think straight.

She lay on her bed, her room immaculate, it had become a habit growing up that anger had been associated with cleaning, and now she found it therapeutic to clean. The Dursley's had left an hour ago, citing going to an awards for the best suburban lawn competition, whatever that was. She'd wait another hour, until she was sure the Dursley's were really gone, then take her trunk and disappear into the night, until she could think straight.

As if someone had read her mind, she felt the woosh of magic, and the soft click of her room unlocking. Startled, she shot to her feet, retrieving her wand from the bedside table, and slowly made her way down the stairs.

"Tonks you blew our cover!"

"I'm sorry! I didn't see the plate it's dark in here!"

"Why are we all standing in the dark?"

A wand tip was lit and Holly saw a group of strangers fronted by Mad Eye Moody, and her old professor, Remus Lupin. Forgetting all rational thought, and so glad to see a friendly face, she lowered her wand and descended the stairs.

One of the older witches spoke suddenly, once the light hit Holly's face.

"Oh Remus I don't know what you were on about, except for that Potter hair she's the exact spit of Lily! Just look at those gorgeous eyes!"

Holly felt uncomfortable being examined by a group of strangers who clearly knew who she was, and were examining her looking for remnants of their lost friends, but then again she was used to being stared at. It didn't stop a blush creeping up cheeks and her nervously playing with one of her curls, starting to stow away her wand.

Lupin too was examining her curiously, as if trying to picture what was missing, perhaps the past year had changed her more than she realised, or maybe people always said she looked like her dad because of the glasses,

"Don't lower your wand girl! What it we'd been Death Eaters?"

Mad-Eye pronounced this with his usual exhuberance, or at least the energy that Barty Crouch Junior had exuded while pretending to be him.

Exasperated with people telling her what to do, and sick of people calling her "girl", Holly snapped back:

"I thought the probability of your identity being stolen by a Death Eater more than once this year was unlikely!"

Lupin's lip twitched minutely, and Mad-Eye grumbled cantankerously at the reminder of his incarceration, Holly felt a twinge of guilt, that had not been particularly sensitive or tactful.

Not that this wasn't all very interesting by Holly was on a short tether and so cut to the chase:

"What are you all doing here?"

Remus took one step forward and said "We've come to take you away, Tonks here will help you pack your stuff"

Without thinking Holly stated "That's okay, I'm already packed"

Remus looked at Holly both questioningly and suspiciously, Holly had the feeling that slip would come back to bite her later.

The journey to their destination was exhilarating, Holly could now officially say she'd been disillusioned by an auror and met a Metamorphmagus, a power that she was secretly coveting. Upon landing and avoiding going into the cloud bank on brooms despite Mad-Eye's insistence, they landed on a secluded road in what looked like a upperclass neighbourhood in London. Her companions ushered her to the door and Lupin handed her a piece of paper upon which was written:

_The Headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix can be found at Number 12 Grimmauld Place._

The script was familiar, and Holly got the impression it was Professor Dumbledore's.

She was pushed and prodded into entering a house that had miraculously emerged from between houses 11 and 13. Told not to touch anything she took in the sinister grandeur of the fading house. It was beautiful, in a Slytherin sense of evil way. A door opened at the end of the corridor and out came Mrs Weasley.

"Oh Holly dear! It's wonderful to see you! Gosh you look like such a grown up young lady, you look so much older without your glasses!"

Mrs Weasley hugged Holly close, and then pulling back tidied a few of her curls, fixing the windblown appearance she'd gotten on her broom.

"Ron and Hermione are upstairs dear, you'll be sharing with her and Ginny, just until we can get a room cleaned out. You'll have to wait for dinner I'm afraid, poor thing you look famished!"

Movement caught the corner of Holly's eye, and her Godfather Sirius emerged from a side door, his face lighting up upon seeing her, Holly ran and hugged him, feeling completely at ease for the first time in months.

"There you are little fawn! I've missed you" he held her close, and Holly decided to let the pet name slide, she'd never really had one before, it was sort of...nice.

Mrs Weasley interrupted their reunion by announcing the meeting was about to begin, and that the adults should go into the kitchen. She directed Holly up the stairs while the rest moved along the hallway.

When halfway up the stairs she heard the front door open again and the bat-like figure of Snape stalked into the house. He was about to pass her when he paused, as if sensing her, and looked straight at her, double taking and going pale, as Aunt Petunia had. His dark brooding gaze took her in, piercing into her emerald eyes, her heart rate sped up, then he looked away, regained his composure, sneered at her, and swept on into the kitchen where the others had gone. Holly remained stuck on that spot for a good 5 minutes, as if his gaze had turned her to stone on the spot, then shook herself out of it, and headed up to the room Ron and Hermione were meant to be in. They had some unfinished business. She didn't want to think about what had just happened with Snape.

**Authors Note: Please Read and Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**Authors Note: Here's another Chapter! I'm going to be mixing in plotlines from The Half Blood Prince and The Deathly Hallows in this chapter, I hope you like it so far and please review!**

4. The Order of the Phoenix

The stairs of Grimmauld Place were a walnut affair, with a strip of expensive-looking Persian carpet down the middle. The walls were covered in rich green faded wallpaper. There were various miscellaneous and possibly dangerous artefacts in cases on the landings of different levels, and what Holly hoped were fake House Elf heads lining the walls. Hermione must have been horrified. The place had a macabre grandeur to it, but was in serious disrepair, and it was quite obvious to Holly that this house had once belonged to a family of the darker persuasion, and noting the snake motifs on the candelabra, probably Slytherin.

She reached the floor Mrs Weasley had indicated, a darkly varnished door that she could hear hurried voices behind, one clearly male, and the other a worried-sounding female. Holly wondered if she should interrupt them, and while she was standing there, she noticed a creaking from the floor above. Looking up she witnessed an ancient and dishevelled House Elf, with spindly arms and legs and a long hooked noise, dragging a sack of what sounded like metal objects across the floor, while muttering to himself in a raspy and hurried voice.

"Kreacher found it, brought it back from the traitor...My poor mistress ... she would weep to see the mudbloods and the blood traitors in her house, the master, the outcast came back! She'd turn in her grave ... throwing away my poor mistresses shiny things and Master Regulus's lock..."

It was then he noticed me, and had the distinct look of someone who had been caught doing something he wasn't meant to. He started, and quickly dragged his sack further away, in the noise and haste he did not notice a shiny object fall from a rip in the fabric, the momentum causing it to clatter down the stairs, and as if though magnetism, land at Holly's feet. She felt compelled to pick it up, and was surprised at its weight, a silver locket, inscribed with the letter "S", on a long silver link chain. Perhaps a belonging of one of the former occupants? The House Elf, Kreacher? Had mentioned shiny things, she wondered who his mistress, or Regulus was. Holly's eyes remained fixated on the smooth metal, caressing the surface with her fingers; it felt cold, almost bitingly so, but so familiar, like she'd held it before. She felt something niggling in the back of her mind, and her scar tingled.

Her examination was interrupted by the realisation that the argument behind the door had stopped, and footsteps were coming towards her. She shoved the locket in her pocket later; maybe she'd ask Hermione about it...later. She opened the door before Hermione could, and was quickly enveloped in the arms of the curly haired girly, who was only slightly shorter.

"Oh Holly I'm so glad to see you, I'm so sorry about the vagueness of the letters, but Professor Dumbledore made us swear not to tell you anything! I see you've tried the Occu-Potion, how is it? What did you do with your hair?"

Holly looked past Hermione to take in the room, which included Ron standing awkwardly to the side, waiting for Hermione to finish her tirade. Hermione squeezed her once more before releasing her, before Ron came over and pulled her into a far briefer one.

"Good to see you mate, what Hermione said about Dumbledore, we are sorry. Mad-Eye gave us this big lecture about security and "CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" We would have told you if we could though. I almost didn't recognise you without the glasses mate, you look like a girl!"

"I was always a girl Ron."

Both Ron and Hermione stood beaming at her, relieved to have her here. But Holly couldn't share it with them, and pressed on with her questions.

"So what is this place? What's going on? Why are we here?"

Ron gave Hermione a significant look, before she answered.

"This is the Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix, it's a society set up by Dumbledore in the first war to fight You-Know-Who. Sirius is letting them use the house.."

There Holly interrupted.

"This is Sirius's house?"

"Yes, well, he inherited it, from what he's said it was the Black family home, and he left at the first opportunity. Anyway, we don't know all of what's going on, we've just been cleaning the house and making it fit for human existence, only Kreacher, Sirius's House Elf, has been here for a good 10 years. We're not allowed to attend meetings."

Ron cut in.

"Yeah mate, after...what happened last summer, Dumbledore came to see Mum and Dad, and they agreed to move me, Ginny, Fred and George here. Bill's even gotten a desk job at Gringotts to help out while Charlie is doing secret stuff for Dumbledore abroad."

There was a conspicuously absent Weasley.

"What about Percy?"

A brief silence followed where Ron turned bright red, and looked very brooding.

"Don't mention Percy around Mum, every time someone says his name she starts crying. Percy's too stuck up his own arse to believe anything the Ministry doesn't have printed in triplicate. So when Dumbledore told everyone You-Know-Who was back, Percy refused to believe it, and had a big argument with Dad saying he wasn't coming. I'd never seen Dad shout like that. He dragged up the fact we...don't have much money, and blamed Dad for it, saying he had no ambition, and he wasn't going to jeopardise his career for a crackpot who's never given us anything. Percy's got his own flat in London now, and he won't talk to Mum and Dad, he even sent back his birthday present".

Ron finished his tale with a shake of his head, and I knew I had to change the subject.

"I saw Snape downstairs, what is he doing here?"

Ron seized the topic, despite Hermione's open mouth to reply, but she let him have it.

"That git? Yeah, Sirius isn't happy about him coming in either; he always strides in like a bat, ignores all of us, Thank Merlin, and swaggers into the meetings. Hermione reckons..."

Hermione cut in then, obviously feeling she could express this part better.

"I think that Snape is spying for Dumbledore, top secret things. I can't know for sure though, but everyone knows that's what he did in the first war, it's really dangerous."

She said this with a kind of respect, but it reminded Holly how out of the know she was, and the feelings of abandonment that had festered within her broke to the surface as she clutched the locket in her cardigan.

"So, you and Ron have been pretty cosy here on your own, knowing what's going on."

Hermione looked at her warily.

"Do you have any idea what it was like? Stuck at the Dursley's? Having no idea what was going on? Sneaking newspapers out of bins and hiding under windowsills to hear the news? Listening to my cousin taunting me because I have nightmares and can't sleep? While you've been here happy as can be, seeing everything that goes on! Then I get attacked by Dementors! Expelled! And now I have a trial for just defending myself? Do you have any idea!"

By this point Hermione was crying, and Ron had gone pale, Holly breathed heavily in the now silent room.

Hermione replied, dry sobbing:

"Holly...Holly we're sorry, but Dumbledore made us promise ... we swore we wouldn't tell you anything by letter. About your trial, I've looked it up, and there's no way they can expel you for defending yourself..."

Holly let her carry on, listening numbly to the news about the attack on her character from the Daily Prophet, and the new names she had been given such as the "The-Girl-Who-Lied". Of being isolated from news for so long was bad enough, the news that she was now widely known as a liar and a mental case was worse. Yet another thing she wished she could cleanse from her brain.

The silence of the room that followed was interrupted by a load pop as the Weasley twins entered the room in style.

Hermione was affronted by their sudden arrival.

"Honestly, the minute you got your license you started abusing it; you were only a floor away!"

"Miss Holly Potter, we thought we heard you dulcet tones upstairs, honestly you really should express your feelings more."

Holly took her hand out of her pocket to shake both their extended hands. Their entrance and mock formality broke the ice effectively, and Holly quirked her lip, Fred and George always had a way of making her feel better, especially when they were being goofy.

"I suppose I was just frustrated, I'm sorry, but I've just been on my own for a while."

Ginny entered a little after, and Holly gave her a hug. Ginny had been particularly attacked to Holly since she rescued her in the Chamber of Secrets, but lately had been far less intimidated by her fame.

They talked for a little while about Quidditch, which Hermione was quite put out about, and the cleaning that had been going on in the house.

Mrs Weasley came after an hour, and called them down to dinner.

Holly was thankful Snape was already leaving through the front door when they reached the kitchen. Hermione whispered to her that he never stayed for dinner.

The Kitchen was a large one, with silverware bearing an old crest and a large kitchen table which sat at least 20. Seated at it were Bill, Tonks, Remus and Sirius, hastily rolling up what looked like building plans.

They greeted her rather too enthusiastically, as if knowing she'd seen something she hadn't. Mrs Weasley covered the blunder but hastily bowling out Stew, and Sirius's hand narrowly escaped a large knife as the Weasley twins used their wands to move the stew pot.

Sirius gave her a bear hug, and pulled her down into the chair next to his.

"Gosh Holly, I nearly didn't recognise you, you're looking more like Lily every day, except for that mop, we all know where that comes from!"

He mussed her hair while she protested, smoothing the mess of curls back into its original position. Mrs Weasley gave Sirius a disapproving look.

Holly was impressed by Tonks, who was transforming her nose into various requested shapes, obviously a regular past time, while Remus looked on with fond eyes, and slightly more fond than was strictly friendly. She'd save that thought for later.

After a fine dinner that left Holly feeling like she was going to burst at the seams, Sirius brought up the topic of the Order, which Mrs Weasley was not happy about at all. Although Holly interjected that she wanted to know what was going on, the fight between Mrs Weasley devolved into one-upmanship about their relationship with Holly. Mrs Weasley even stooped to bringing up Sirius's time in Azkaban.

Remus stood up, and became the mediator, ever the calm Professor, he managed to make Mrs Weasley and Sirius back down. This did not seem to phase anyone else, so this indicated their squabbles were fairly common place.

The subject of Holly's trial came up, and Sirius must have seen the queasy expression that came over her as he put an arm around her and assured her that nothing bad was going to happen. They informed her that the trial would be at the ministry, and an escort from the Order would get her there safely.

"Amelia Bones is fair Holly" said Remus smiling encouragingly "She'll hear you out"

It made Holly feel slightly better, but in the back of her mind, she hoped that if she was expelled she could stay at Grimmauld Place with Sirius. If she couldn't, and Dumbledore tried to send her to the Dursley's, Holly wasn't planning on staying there long. The moment she was dropped off, she'd be gone.

The time got late, and Mrs Weasley ushered them to bed, showing Holly a room she could share with Hermione and Ginny, that contained iron framed beds, and looked like it had probably once been some kind of nursery.

The walls were covered with moving depictions of what Ginny said were wizarding fairytales by Beedle the Bard. According to Hermione he was the Wizarding world's equivalent to The Brothers Grim, with some suitably grizzly metaphors. There was a small book shelf that contained an ancient looking copy of _The Tales of Beedle the Bard_, and Holly wondered if her parents had ever read them to her. She took the book to bed with her, hoping to derive some familiarity, or just some comfort from them, before she was plunged into her nightmares.

That night she didn't dream of the graveyard. She was in a dimly lit corridor, the torchlight flickering on a door at the end, passing a portrait of a bored looking man with a black beard, the door was what she wanted, she needed it, it wouldn't open, and she was frustrated. The answer was behind it, she had to open it. She reached out her hand to the door knob.

She was woken by the pain in her scar, the heat coming off of the locket in the cardigan she'd donned over her pyjamas to ward off the chill, and the tale of the three brothers open on her chest.

**Authors Note: Please Read and Review.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, if I did I'd live in a replica of Hogwarts Castle surrounded by minions. **

**Authors Note: Here's another instalment where we get some bonding, some poignant questions and some girl time!**

Holly was the first to wake up the next morning, feeling disoriented and confused due to the weight on her chest, and automatically reached for her glasses on the ottoman next to her, before realising that she didn't need them. Opening her eyes she recognised the children's story book she had read last night, and wondered if the gothic nature of _The Tale of the Three Brothers_ had induced the strange dream of the corridor.

Holly sat up and surveyed the bedraggled room, noting the neatness of Hermione's sleeping area, as opposed to the bomb-site of Ginny's section. Holly amused herself with the thought that disorder must be genetic for the Weasley's, Ron's room always looked like someone had been duelling in it. Holly was used to Hermione's compulsive neatness; at Hogwarts she always berated Parvati and Lavender for their sloppy housekeeping.

Come to think of it, Holly wondered how the House Elves of Hogwarts did the laundry without touching the clothes? Or perhaps they could as long as Professor Dumbledore didn't hand them to them, in which case did Dumbledore have to do his own washing? Holly knew she was over-thinking this, Hermione probably knew, she'd ask her.

Holly had learned compulsive neatness from her Aunt Petunia, maintaining strict cleanliness at Privet Drive meant she was more likely to be ignored than berated, which suited her just fine. She always got irked whenever Uncle Vernon criticised her housework, especially when he ended with a misogynist comment about how it was all she was "good for". Yet, Uncle Vernon would never pick up a broom in his lifetime, unless he planned to thrash her with it, and if you asked him to hand over a mop, he probably wouldn't know what it looked like.

Holly hated double standards, especially hypocrisy.

Remembering that Ginny had pointed out a washroom across the hall, and unable to go back to sleep, Holly decided to get ready for the day ahead. Grabbing a green scoop neck t-shirt from her trunk (she'd balked at the idea in the shop but the saleslady had insisted she needed it), a pair of kick flare jeans and the necessary underwear; she headed to the archaic bathroom. There was no shower like a muggle bathroom, instead a claw-footed tarnished silver tub that would comfortable seat two people. The walls were covered with chipped dark green tiles; there was a silver sink with snake heads for taps that reminded her ominously of Myrtles bathroom. Oddly enough there was a mirror covering the entirety of the wall, making the bathroom seem bigger, and showing Holly in her entirety, the Black's weren't ones for modesty then.

Placing her clothes on a hook on the door, Holly was glad to see there were already toiletries and towels in a clear fronted cabinet next to the bath. Many of them were similar to the ones that Ron had given her for her birthday, so rather than disturb Hermione and Ginny by rummaging through her truck she'd use what was already here. Turning on the taps of the bath and experimenting with the various bubbles she shirked off her nightclothes and was careful to remove the locket from her cardigan and resisted the urge to put it on, carefully placing it on top of her clothes before she got into the steaming water.

Holly took a moment to lay under the water listening to her own heartbeat, feeling the pressure on her face, and watching the reflection on the surface, enjoying the novelty of being able to do so without her glasses getting rusty. Waiting until the last moment of desperation, she gasped as she broke the surface, and noted with disdain that her curls had defied the pull of the water. She scrubbed, washed and dried, before donning her clean clothes and putting her hair up in a towel. She looked at herself in the mirror, a habit that she secretly felt was vain but couldn't break out of, and noted her hair reached her waist now, perhaps she'd ask Mrs Weasley to trim it, she was rather obsessed with Holly's hair.

The wizarding clock on the wall stated it was 4am, far too early for anyone else to be up, of so Holly thought until she heard crockery clinking obnoxiously downstairs. Not feeling like facing anyone yet, Holly decided to explore the upper levels, and absent mindedly placed the locket in her jean pocket. She quietly put her things back in the nursery room, careful not to wake Hermione and Ginny, and headed upstairs.

There were various empty portraits on the walls, and some empty display cases, perhaps that is where the locket had come from. The balustrade felt cold underneath her hand as she ascended, passing several doors that contained what looked like secondary sitting rooms, sewing parlours and libraries, until she reached another floor that appeared to contain the master suites. The doors had golden and tarnished plates on them, stating the names of former occupants. Holly trod lightly past the door that said "Sirius Orion Black" (with what suspiciously looked like burn marks on it), that contained an occupant who was snoring loudly, who Holly could only assume was Sirius himself. She wondered how her Godfather was coping with living in his childhood home. Being the "Black Sheep" of the Black family, Holly assumed that their relationship had not been a healthy or a happy one. Holly would hate to have to return to Privet Drive once she was of age. The very thought made her feel slightly queasy.

Holly continued on past a door that was a bathroom, grander than the one downstairs, another which looked like a games room, and then to a door that she felt a strange pull to, that of "Regulus Arcturus Black", perhaps a sibling of Sirius? If Holly had not heard of him, then perhaps he had died young. Opening the door cautiously she saw Slytherin pride displayed on the walls, Snake banners and a green bedspread and bed curtains. A moving picture of the Slytherin Quidditch team circa 1984 was displayed proudly on the wall. Holly followed the names written in order on the bottom until she reached "Regulus Black (Seeker)". So he played the same position as her. The boy in the picture looked remarkably like Sirius, except more gangly, but he had the carefree smirk that Holly remembered from Sirius in her parents wedding photo.

Looking around the room she saw that it was in pristine condition compared to the others, everything polished and fresh smelling. Perhaps Kreacher the Elf still cleaned in here, but why not rest of the house? Looking around it could be easy to assume that Regulus had just walked out, books littered the desk, odd pieces of parchment with slogans and drawings on them, lined the wall and the waste basket was full. An 18 year old "Quidditch Weekly" was opened to the page 3 on the bed with a rather scantily clad Holyhead Harpies player astride her broom. Now she knew why Ron liked this magazine so much, and why when she asked to look at it, it was always missing a page.

Boys.

It was fairly clean compared to Ron's room at the Burrow, or what she'd seen of the boys' dorm at Hogwarts when she'd visit him. It was strangely sad to think this was a teenage boys room, one who'd liked Quidditch and girls, had friends and parents, a brother who was down the hall, and he'd never be coming back. Holly was familiar with death, but to see the evidence of the void it left behing was harrowing. She wondered if Cedric's room was still like this at the Diggory's, she felt her eyes sting.

If Voldemort were to kill her, she wouldn't have a room like this to preserve, or parents to miss her, just a trunk full of things and a bank vault.

Maybe she'd write a Will, Remus and the Weasley's could use the money. Hermione or Ginny might like some of the clothes, and Sirius might like the photo album, and maybe a few of the drawings she'd done. After the events of the Tri-Wizard, maybe she should think about these things.

Holly was glad to be distracted by what sounded suspiciously like feathers rustling, and left the tomb that was Regulus's room, closing the door slowly behind her. She checked to confirm the snoring from Sirius's room before heading towards the rustling coming from a set of double doors with no name plaque. Holly paused before take a slow breath out and opening them to be confronted with a startled Hippogriff lounging on a King Size four poster bed. It was Buckbeak! He stared at her and she remembered to make the customary bow, keeping eye contact, until he nodded his head to her and she sat on the bed, stroking his beak to his trilling delight. Buckbeak relaxed, and lay with his head on the bed. Holly relaxed against him, continuing to stroke the downy feathers of his head.

She relaxed there for a while, listening the Buckbeak's loud but steady breathing, and closed her eyes. She felt safe with the majestic animal beside her; he didn't expect anything from her, didn't keep secrets, didn't ask questions, he just wanted some attention. If only everyone were that simple to please.

Holly was distracted from her thoughts by the door opening slowly, to reveal Sirius, looking bedraggled and sleep deprived, if not a little hungover, and rather surprised to see her. He was holding what looked like dead rabbits, probably to feed Buckbeak, who suddenly looked very interested in Sirius.

"Holly? What are you doing up here? And so early?"

"I couldn't sleep, dreams. I hope you don't mind but I decided to look around a bit, didn't want to wake up Hermione and Ginny."

Sirius gave Holly a knowing look; he probably suffered from the same problem since his escape from Azkaban. He didn't press the issue, she liked him even more for that, and she moved off the bed so he could feed Buckbeak. Once he was done and Buckbeak had commenced with post-breakfast grooming, Sirius nodded his head to indicate they should leave the room.

Holly broke the silence.

"So this was your parent's house?"

Sirius sneered involuntarily "Yes, the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black, I left here as soon as I could, I was 16 when I couldn't take their Pure-Blood mania anymore, I ran away."

"Where did you go?"

Sirius's expression softened, and a warm smile came over him, he seemed to light up inside.

"Your Dad's, I turned up in the middle of the summer, your Grandparents unofficially adopted me, I was always welcome to Sunday Lunch. They even helped me get set-up in my first flat with the money my Great Uncle Alphard left me. I couldn't inherit before Regulus after my Mum blasted me off of the family tapestry."

"Regulus was your brother? I'm sorry but I looked in his room before I found Buckbeak."

Sirius looked slightly saddened.

"Yeah, my _stupid_ younger brother, he was brain-washed by their Pure-Blood mania, the _good_ son. So when Voldemort became popular, he was ready and willing to sign up. I don't think he realised what he was in for, last I heard he was killed for desertion. I suppose he changed his mind too late. I sometimes think if I'd stayed..."

Sirius looked pensive, Holly was sorry for opening old wounds. She tried to change the subject.

"What's a family tapestry?"

Sirius seized the opportunity for a subject change.

"Pure Blood witches and wizards like to keep track and display their heritage, there's a whole wall downstairs devoted to the bloodline. Do you want to see?"

"Sure"

With that they quietly made their way downstairs, passing the room that Holly had stayed in and entering what looked like a library and sitting room. It was as grand as the rest of the house, containing volumes of books that looked distinctly sinister. The tapestry was situated on the far wall, a centrepiece to the room, a tree of spindly names and dates with small moving portraits of witches and wizards. Holly noted the early names, one even a Headmaster at Hogwarts, before spotting something distinctly familiar that was partly obscured from being blasted off.

"Wilhelmina ...something... Potter and Septus...Septus? something... Black -1854? Does that mean we're related Sirius?"

Holly remembered back to Mr Weasley saying that all Pure-Blood witches and wizards were related somehow.

Sirius's mouth quirked "Very very distantly Little Faun, but then all of the Pure-Bloods are, by my reckoning we're probably second cousins 20 times removed."

Holly felt warm inside, so even if it was very distantly, she shared a blood connection to someone, even if it meant she did with Bellatrix Black too, who she also noted on the tapestry as a first cousin to Sirius, as well as...

"Narcissa Black and Lucius Malfoy, you're related to the Malfoy's?"

Sirius smirked in the light of her new understanding, even if it was over two dozen times removed, she was related to Draco too, a chill went up her spine, he probably knew it too.

"Tonks too infact, Andromeda, her mother, is Narcissa and Bellatrix's elder sister, she ran off with a Muggleborn called Ted. Nice man, met him a few times. Andromeda got blasted off so Tonk's isn't even on the tree, unwanted marriages make it harder to track bloodlines, at least the unofficial ones."

A new thought occurred to her.

"Am I related to the Weasley's at all?"

Sirius looked thoughtful for a moment.

"I'm not sure, it's possible, but it would be very distantly I think, your family had a habit of marrying unconventionally, lots of eloping and running to Gretna Green with witches and wizards from disapproving Pure-Blood families. While the Potters were a respected bloodline, they were also "muggle lovers", and had a reputation for rakish behaviour. I could look into it if you like; it'd give me something to do here"

Holly was surprised by Sirius's sudden sullen countenance.

"I thought you worked for the order?"

It was the wrong thing to say.

"At the moment, because I'm a wanted man, I'm not much use for recruitment, and Dumbledore doesn't want me captured as this is my house. I'm a glorified _hotel_ at the moment."

For a man of action like Sirius, staying behind and keeping the home fires burning must be torture. Holly's summer hadn't been that different, and if the court case went badly, she'd probably be in the same situation.

Holly took Sirius's hand and gave it a squeeze, partly for her own comfort as well as his.

"If..if I get expelled from Hogwarts...can I, I mean you said in third year...but if you don't want to... If I get expelled can I come and live with you, here? I won't be sent back to the Dursley's, even if Dumbledore tells me I have to!"

Sirius looked startled by what she just said, and she hoped he wouldn't pass on that last part to Dumbledore.

"We'll see Holly, it's not really up to me..."

"But it is! You're my Godfather, my magical guardian; I don't care if the Dursley's housed me. Where is it written that I have to live with them? I mean, legally shouldn't I be living with you?"

A sorrowful look came across his face, she hated to remind him of his absence from her life. She briefly wondered what life would have been like if he hadn't gone after Pettigrew, if he'd taken her from Hagrid and run.

He sighed and continued.

"Right now, I'm a fugitive; I can't enforce my legal rights..."

"But if I get expelled I'll be on the run anyway, there'll be nothing between me and Voldemort. If this place is as safe as everyone thinks it is, then whatever protection I have at the Dursley's is probably just as effective. Even if Dumbledore takes me to the Dursley's himself, I won't be staying, I won't stay somewhere I've never been wanted just for my own safety, when I'll be just as safe here, maybe more so with you. Whatever protection my mum gave me, Voldemort took my blood in the graveyard, he can touch me, it's not working like it used to! How do I know he can't just walk into Privet Drive himself now?"

Sirius said nothing, so she continued:

"This is _your_ house, I'm _your_ Goddaughter, and the Order are based here because _you_ let them. My living here is _your_ decision, not theirs, and _not_ Dumbledore's."

Holly was surprising herself with her own argument, but she was tired of decisions being made behind closed doors, and other options not being tried. She wanted to decide who she lived with, and if it wasn't with Sirius, then it would be somewhere she chose.

"You're still underage Holly, you're 15! You can't be on your own, not legally, the Ministry would never allow it."

"Isn't there...isn't there a way I can prove I'm old enough to live on my own? That I can become emancipated as an adult? I hate to brag Sirius but I've handled things people Dumbledore's age could never dream of! I've cooked, cleaned and washed for myself since I was 4! If you can't speak for me, then why can't I find a way to speak for myself?"

Sirius looked thoughtful now, and after contemplating for what seemed a decade he answered.

"If you get expelled, or even just for the holidays, you can live here if it's what you want, _I_ say you can live here. Regarding the Dursley's, you'll probably have to talk to Dumbledore directly. As for emancipation...I never had to deal with it as my parents were glad to be rid of me, but Remus or Tonks might know something about it, Remus is usually good with legal things, and Tonks and Arthur work at the ministry, they'll probably know who you need to talk to."

Holly was gratified that Sirius was taking her request to heart; no one ever took her seriously when it came to big decisions. They always said that she was too young to understand, or she'd have to wait until she was older. Come to think of it, Dumbledore always seemed to control the major decisions in her life, and withhold the reason why. She was sick of not being consulted about her own life.

Holly moved into a hug with Sirius, and the affection she felt there made her feel that everything was going to be alright. After breaking apart and Sirius ruffling her hair, he led her downstairs to get some breakfast. Already in the kitchen was Remus, he must have been the one making the noise, looking tired and drinking what looked like his third cup of tea. He greeted them with as much enthusiasm as his tired body would allow, and Holly realised that the full moon must be approaching. The clock above the stove read 5.30 am, the rest of the house would not wake for a few hours.

They spent an hour with Remus, talking about Quidditch, the Occu-Potion, and embarrassingly, how much Holly had changed since they last saw her. Remus after an hour cited he was no "on duty" and had to go, and when he left Holly remembered the locket in her pocket.

Taking it out, she showed it to Sirius.

"Your House Elf, Kreacher? He dropped this by accident down the stairs, I think he was trying to save the stuff you were throwing away. Is it an heirloom? It seems familiar to me, is it in a book or something?"

Sirius looked at it disinterestedly, he held it out in front of him, then tried to open it, it wouldn't budge. Holly felt strange now that Sirius was holding it, she wanted it back.

"I don't think I've seen it before, but then I never went rifling through dear mumsy's jewellery box. Kreacher probably nicked it to stop me throwing it out. I guess it's mine now, but I don't have a use for it. Keep it if you like; it looks valuable, like everything around here, if you don't fancy wearing it you could always sell it. In fact, why don't you and the girls go have a look at my mum's stuff, the clothes will be no use, old bag was huge, but if you see anything you like take it, I'll just throw it otherwise. Someone might as well enjoy it, though I wouldn't hope for much, wizarding heirlooms can be quite gaudy. Pure-Bloods don't believe in understatement."

Holly nodded, and put the locket in her pocket, relieved to have it back, it felt ice cold in her pocket, as if Sirius hadn't been holding it moments before.

"Thanks, if anything, Hermione would like to look at the jewellery for the historical value, but Ginny might see something, she's more used to wizarding styles than we are.

They heard rustling and movement from upstairs, it was 6am, Mrs Weasley would probably come down to cook breakfast for their little army.

Holly decided to get things started for her, cracking eggs into a bowl to scramble, and having Sirius light the stove with his wand. Soon Eggs, sausages and bacon were cooking, and Holly started slicing up bread to toast. Sirius watched her efficiency with interest and anticipation.

"You'll make some lucky wizard a great House-Witch someday Little Faun."

Holly felt slightly affronted by the chauvinist remark and turned round to hit him with her spatula, before seeing that Sirius was attempting not to laugh, he was deliberately baiting her.

Holly rolled her eyes.

"You're lucky this is your house, bad dogs don't usually get fed."

This sent Sirius into roaring laughter. The smell of the meat seemed to have aroused the other men of the house, as the Weasley twins apparated into the kitchen and grabbed a seat, and a groggy Ron, still in his broomstick pyjamas and ruffled hair, slouched into the kitchen. Mrs Weasley entered the room and was surprised to see Holly had already served Sirius and the boys their breakfast, which they were eating heartily, and commented on what a good girl she was, and that she'd take over so Holly could eat. Although she was not all that hungry she humoured Mrs Weasley by taking some scrambled eggs, bacon and toast.

"Holly mate" stated Ron through a mouth of food "If you weren't my best mate, I'd marry you for your cooking."

"Not before we did Ron!" stated the Weasley twins in unison.

Holly glared at them over her plated, and ignored the fact she was blushing a little. No one ever complimented on her cooking, the Dursley's just demanded it, and criticised the slightest flaw.

15 minutes or so later, Hermione and Ginny arrived fully dressed and got some food from Mrs Weasley, and she informed them of the plan to de-doxy the library curtains today. Holly informed them that afterwards Sirius had stated the girls could look through his mother's jewellery, and Mrs Weasley actually gave him a semi-approving look for his generosity.

After breakfast they donned face coverings and gloves and tackled the doxies, that were much more troublesome than Holly would have thought, and Holly decided not to point out what she had discovered on the tapestry, at least not right now.

The boys decided to have a round robin chess tournament in the corner of the library while the girls looked at their "girl stuff".

Mrs Black's jewellery was suitably grand, taking the box from the room after saying hello to Buckbeak, they layed it out on a table in the library. It was quite gaudy, filled with galleon sized diamonds and emeralds, rubies and Sapphires, one of which, a tear drop cut emerald in a silver filigree leaf motif the size of a sickle Holly decided to keep. It looked brand new hidden underneath layers of egg sixed diamonds, so Holly decided it must not have been a favourite of Mrs Blacks, it was rather simple compared to the other pieces and that made her like it more. Ginny didn't see anything she liked; stating that in wizarding terms the jewellery was "granny" jewellery, the sort of thing her Great Aunt Muriel wore with pride. Hermione seemed fascinated by some of the goblin gold chains, and told Holly that her chain was Goblin made silver. Tonks, who had just come off shift at the ministry, looked at the pieces with disinterest, although she had a blood right to them, they weren't her style at all, as was indicated by her pink hair and Weird Sisters t-shirt. She said her mum, Andromeda, still has a few pieces that she had kept when she ran away, and wore them on special occasions, but had despaired of trying to illicit Tonk's interest in them. She was a Daddy's girl through and through.

Mrs Weasley watched them fondly, and looked slightly affronted by the "granny" comment; as though she admired the style she stated that she would never actually wear any of it. To her it symbolised a brand of witch that spent more time on their appearance than with their family. You don't wear giant diamonds while raising babies. Holly liked Mrs Weasley's priorities, and so the rest of the jewellery, apart from a few gaudy but historical pieces that Hermione wanted to examine further, ended up in the sack along with Mrs Black's clothes, and some fur coats and scarves that made Ginny sneeze.

Holly liked spending this quality time with just the girls, she didn't spend a lot of time with girls apart from Hermione, Parvati and Lavender got on her nerves.

She tried not to think about the face she may not be allowed to sleep in her dorm again.

That night she dreamed of the corridor again, but this time someone else was there with her, it was Tom, he held her hand and led her to the door, told her to open it, they needed to know what was behind it, they could do it...together.

She woke with her scar prickling and the heavy feeling of the locket in her dressing gown, almost blisteringly cold.

Holly went back to sleep, and the next morning, forgot to ask Hermione about the locket again.

**Authors Note: Hope you liked it, please read and review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, otherwise, I would keep a room in my house dedicated to Wizard sweets. **

**Authors Note: Here's the trial and some added tribulation! **

Chapter 6

The Ministry of Magic

Staying at Grimmauld Place could never be considered dull, especially with the amount of work they had to do to make the place habitable. 10 years of decay had reduced the once grand building into a nesting place for magical pests and fungi, especially the ones that fought against eviction. Mad-Eye Moody had identified a Boggart in one of the upper drawing room closets and had promised Mrs Weasley to deal with it later. She'd declined and stated she would handle it herself.

As Holly's trial approached on the 29th of August she grew more nervous, and her friends frantically attempted to put her mind on something else. There was cleaning, chess, exploding snap, reading, Ginny even managed to talk Holly into experimenting with make-up. How Ginny had make-up in the first place Holly decided not to ask, it was clear that Mrs Weasley didn't know about it. Ginny could be pretty devious, sometimes more so than her twin brothers.

The arrival of their Hogwarts letters was a welcome relief, althoughly slightly bitter sweet due to Holly's legal predicament. As expected Hermione became a Prefect, Holly knew she had no hopes on that account. The surprise of the day was Ron, who stood bewildered with his shiny "P" badge being teased mercilessly by the twins. Mrs Weasley was beaming at him. The night had been dampened for Holly by a photograph Mad-Eye had shown her of the original order, containing her own and Neville's parents, Sirius and Remus, and a host of witches and wizards that were no longer alive.

How many of the people she had met in the Order would live to see Voldemort's defeat?

But even these mortality concerns could not distract Holly the night before her hearing. Holly had left the nursery (as she now called it) the moment Ginny and Hermione had fallen asleep. Rather than go downstairs with the adults who she heard fervently discussing something, most likely the plans for her transportation, she went into the library and found herself examining the books there. Most were fairly sinister, but there were various common place school books from generations of Black's.

Perhaps if she was expelled tomorrow she could at least self-teach, even if they took her wand. She shuddered at the thought of losing it. Most potions didn't require one and although Snape had made her develop distaste for the subject, considering last year's Polyjuice incident she resolved to learn more about it.

Taking a random volume from the shelf she took it to the long couch by the fire and attempted to read about complimentary and conflicting ingredients.

She woke the next morning in a cold sweat to another dream of Tom and the doorway.

Sneaking back into her room she found Mrs Weasley had laid out a new dress for her to wear. It was an emerald green short sleeve summer dress with a knee length flowing skirt and black buckle shoes. Obviously Mrs Weasley wanted her to look innocent and a dress was the way to do it. There was even a ribbon for her to tie her hair back. Taking the dress to the bathroom, she put it on with the shoes and her new emerald necklace. She must have left the door open because Ginny caught her critiquing herself in the mirror.

"Hey, I hope you like the dress, Mum picked it out, said it would match your eyes. Let me put a little make-up on you, just a _little_ don't give me that look. This green eyeliner will really make your eyes pop-out, we're going for an innocent look!"

Holly didn't think she looked like herself, she hadn't been this girly since the Yule Ball, and that had required Hermione and Ginny attacking her with lotions and a hairbrush. Luckily since the summer she'd developed some new grooming habits but she had to admit she looked innocent. Image was obviously very important in the wizarding world, looking innocent helped equate to being innocent.

Mrs Weasley helped to confirm this by complimenting her on how beautiful she looked, and proceeding to take the leftover ribbon from Holly and tie it as an Alice band in her curls. Holly started to think that all she'd need was an apron and she'd be the Emerald Alice about to tumble down the rabbit hole. The metaphor wasn't all that inaccurate as Mr Weasley described the visitor's entrance and how the Ministry of Magic was in fact underground.

Mr Weasley stated that he would be escorting her today, and that Dumbledore would be meeting them there. The trial was at 1 o'clock in Amelia Bones's office. Holly wondered if she was any relation to Susan. After Mrs Weasley finished fussing over her hair she tried to feed Holly, who only managed to force a piece of dry toast into her stomach.

Sirius entered after Mrs Weasley was done, and too complimented her on the dress. He picked up a piece of Holly's flowing hair and pulled the curl so it sprang, and pulled her aside for a talk.

"Remember, no matter what happens today, you'll be coming back _here_, to me. I've talked to Arthur and after your trial, if you still want to, he'll take you to someone who knows about custody issues. It's a small department as wizarding government doesn't usually concern itself with family affairs. From what I've heard the Witch who works there isn't all there, so you may get the paperwork done with a minimal amount of fuss. I wish I could come with you, but I'd draw too much attention. I believe in you and I'll see you at home tonight.

_Home_, Holly liked the sound of that.

Sirius pulled her into a hug, that Mrs Weasley appeared to disapprove of as the instant they finished she began to tidy Holly up again.

It was 7am when Mr Weasley stated they had better head off. Holly would be spending most of the day with him in his office. It was almost like "Take your daughter to work day". Well, it would be if Mr Weasley was her father and she wasn't summoned for a criminal case. After Holly had run to fetch a small handbag (enlarged on the inside) and compulsively placed her money, wand and the locket in it, they began to walk to the nearest tube station. Mr Weasley had a little trouble with the barriers at the station, so Holly was in charge of money and tickets. He got very excited by the train doors opening and closing on their own, citing to her in hushed whispers how he loved the wonders of ecklectricity.

The visitor's entrance to The Ministry of Magic was an unassuming red-telephone box. Mr Weasley rather unconfidently typed in 62442 on the keypad, and cited that he and and Miss Holly Potter were arriving for a hearing. Holly placed the delivered badge onto her dress as they lurched down into the ground.

The Fountain of Magical Brethren was rather too over the top for Holly's taste. She doubted any Goblin would look up so adoringly at a witch or wizard and it smacked to her of wizarding arrogance and belief in their own species superiority. You think they'd have learned something from all the Goblin Rebellions Binn's droned on about in History of Magic. Then again, most of the people here were probably taught by Binn's and so they wouldn't have learned anything. It was for a charitable cause though; a plaque dedicated all proceeds from the fountain to St Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies.

Holly promised herself that if she wasn't expelled, she'd empty her whole purse into the fountain.

After registering her wand with the disinterested wizard at the front desk they walked towards a lift that was full of hurried looking witches and wizards beginning their work day. Several greeted Mr Weasley cordially and gave her a sly or interested look. She could have sworn a gangly wizard around Percy's age was giving her the eye, but he quickly stopped when Mr Weasley looked his way. Speaking of Percy, the next floor, that of International Co-operation, saw him entering. Both Weasley's deliberately ignoring each other. The tension was palpable.

Once they reached Magical Law Enforcement they exited and walked past several dozen cubicles under the banner of "Auror" office. One of which sat Kingsley Shacklebolt, Order Member, with a map of the world, and a photograph of Sirius. Of course, Sirius had said Kingsley was in charge of his man hunt. If only the Auror Office knew that Kingsley would be having dinner with his mark tonight!

They passed a smaller set of offices, one of which belonged to Amelia Bones, and onto a tiny corner office that was the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office. It was tiny, with no window showing artificial views such as the ones in the corridor, and two desks facing one another. Mr Weasley's partner wasn't in today, his lumbago was acting up, so Holly got to use the other chair.

They had only been there half an hour when Kingsley came running in and stated that Holly's trail had been moved to 9am and it was in court room 1 in the basement.

Mr Weasley hurriedly ushered her into the elevator, and as they sunk lower, Holly felt her spirits following suit.

The lift pronounced "Law Courts and the Department of Mysteries" and they entered a darkly lit set of labyrinthine corridors. Holly almost stopped dead when they ran past the corridor of her nightmares, complete with locked door, but forced herself to continue on their hurried walk to the courtroom.

Mr Weasley ushered her in, and wished her luck stating he wasn't permitted to go in with her before the door closed behind her. It was the courtroom from the pensieve in Dumbledore's office. Complete with Wizengamot, and chain bound defendant chair. Holly walked with her head held high but not defiantly, and sat in the defendant chair, the chains did not stir.

Fudge began proceedings as if she was already convicted, but the motherly look some of the older witches in the Wizengamot, and quite a few fatherly looks from the men, meant that her appearance was working in her favour. A few made sly glances at her forehead hoping to see her scar. Fudge verbally attacking a 15-year-old girl with curls in a summer dress seemed to highlight his manic attitude towards her.

"You are Holly Jane Potter of Number 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging?"

So the questioning began and Holly wondered if Dumbledore hadn't gotten the time change when the doors burst open and Dumbledore appeared in all his glory, and made light of the fact the court date was changed. Holly resisted the urge to smile as several of the old witches waved at Dumbledore, he was obviously still popular. Dumbledore made short work of Fudge, calling force Mrs Figg as a witness to the patronus. He even managed a few quips at Fudge for calling an entire meeting of the Wizengamot for a case of underage witchcraft.

There were a few interruptions from a frog-like woman with a pink bow, (that gave Holly the urge to remove her own hair band), that Dumbledore was quickly able to counter by questioning the authority of a ministry that allowed dementors to attack a child. Holly felt slightly affronted at being called a child, in some cultures she'd be married by now. That thought made her cringe a little. Never before had Holly seen what a master tactician and manipulator Dumbledore was. She wondered why he'd stayed Headmaster of Hogwarts, Hagrid had said Dumbledore had been offered the Ministership countless times. No wonder Fudge felt threatened, he was clearly intellectually outmatched. The only thing he could do was remove Dumbledore's accolades and attempt to lessen his popularity.

Yet despite her gratitude at his intervention in her trial, what irked her more than his absence from her the past month was that at no time in the trial did Dumbledore look at her. Never once did he look into her eyes.

Perhaps he was mad at her for her part in the removal of his awards and achievements. Defending the return of Voldemort had gotten him a lot of trouble. Maybe he resented her.

Dumbledore was definitely avoiding her and after the trial did not even stop to congratulate her. Mr Weasley sped in to give her a hearty handshake and a small hug. Percy, who was taking the minutes, strode past without a word.

Holly accepted his congratulations and was immensely relieved that she would be returning to Hogwarts.

As they left the courtroom Mr Weasley was called away by a colleague and he told her to wait for him.

The glee of her victory had blinded her to her surroundings, now that she looked she saw that she was by her nightmare corridor. The locket throbbed in her bag, and she felt the need to walk down there. As if bidden by another force she began slowly walking towards the door, passing torch brackets and portraits, most of them empty. Finally after what felt like an eternity she reached the door, a sense of triumph and glee filled her, and her scar prickled. The plaque above the door read "The Department of Mysteries", it definitely was mysterious and forbidden. As if with a mind of its own her hand began to rise up to touch the door knob.

It was then she felt a presence behind her and stopped, turning around but not seeing anyone else there. Holly turned back, touched the door knob and the metal was warm under her hand. She twisted it, it turned smoothly and the door opened a fraction allowing a beam of light to enter the deserted corridor.

It was then she heard Mr Weasley calling her name, and as if breaking from a trance, recoiled from the door. Looking around to see if anyone had witnesses her indiscretion, she closed it again and quickly ran up the corridor to meet with a searching Mr Weasley. She told him his voice had echoed and she'd gotten lost.

Holly had no idea that Sturgis Podmore, Order Member, lay unconscious to the right of the door, or that Lucius Malfoy, Death Eater, watched the proceedings while disillusioned to the wall with great interest.

The Dark Lord must know about the girl.

There was a new plan.

...

Mr Weasley, as promised, had taken her to the Magical Family Affairs Office. It was run by a very bored, podgy witch with fly away hair and a stack of leaflets ranging from "So, You Want to Marry a Muggle", "How to Disinherit your Children" and "Emancipation: The Cure for Pushy Parents". They looked fairly dated and somewhat dusty. It was clear that this office did not receive many visitors, Wizards liked to keep family matters in-house.

The bored witch handed Holly some very long and boring forms that she dutifully filled in. The witch didn't even look at the forms, using an auto-sign quill to process the document and sign it. She then lazily tapped the paper, not even looking at it and Holly watched amazed as it folded itself into an origami bird and flew out of the office.

Holly then sat there for an hour; she let Mr Weasley go back to work stating that when she was done she'd come and find his office, it was further along the corridor. The only thing to do was read the pamphlets. Holly found "How to Deal with your Squib" to be quite insulting, it described Squibs as if they had a fatal disease, if this was the official advice no wonder Mr Filch was so bitter. She'd better not show Hermione, she'd start another campaign.

The posters on the wall were faded and peeling, containing slogans such as "Don't Charm your Children" or "Love Potions = Legal Proceedings". She tried not to laugh at a moving picture of a silhouetted wizarding couple duelling stating "Use Words. Not Wands".

If people followed that advice, there'd be a lot less duelling and a lot more therapy.

Holly was nervous; she didn't want to be interrogated again today. What if someone realised what they were processing and raised the alarm?

Her worries were unfounded, after a further half an hour which Holly spent reading several dated copies of Witch Weekly (all of which had the crossword filled in) the origami bird flew back into the room and unfolded on the desk. The witch finally removed her eyes from the Prophet, scanned the document looking for something, found it, and stamped the document with a Ministry Seal. The paper glowed and then produced two more, it was now in triplicate. The witch flicked her wand, one copy flew into a filing cabinet, the other folded into a bird and went out the door, and the next rolled up and landed on Holly's lap.

The Witch went back to her crossword and tiredly droned that a notification would be sent to her guardians (The Dursley's) and if they signed away their rights then she would be emancipated within a month. Holly should keep this copy of the application for her files, and return in a month's time. Whatever you said about the Ministry, Holly was very grateful for their paperwork efficiency and she hoped that everyone who processed it would be as disinterested in the applicant as this witch was. If she had realised that Holly Potter was trying to move out on her own without adult supervision, then perhaps she might have called someone more senior. But The Daily Prophet Crossword was far more appealing than looking at the applicant.

Holly thought rather guiltily that Ms Grinding (as she found out upon looking at the door as she left) might receive some form of reprimand for processing this paperwork. But it was better this way, if this was all done under the cloak of bureaucracy then the emancipation could not be challenged in a legal court.

If the Dursley's didn't contest it within a month's time, Holly would be an official adult.

Holly found her way back to Mr Weasley's office and he escorted her back to Grimmauld Place.

On the way out of the Ministry, Holly emptied her money purse into the Fountain of Magical Brethren.

Mr Weasley swore himself to secrecy; he'd already done so much for her that Holly felt rather teary. He pulled her to him and stated that he eternally owed her for his daughter's life. It wouldn't be lying to Professor Dumbledore if he wasn't asked.

One thing Professor Dumbledore wasn't counting on was the love of a Father.

...

Upon their return to Grimmauld Place, it seemed that Dumbledore had already been to inform them of Holly's victory. Mrs Weasley had prepared a small party, including a cake and conjured decorations. The Weasley Twins and Ginny did a little gig around the kitchen chanting "She Got Off", to which Mrs Weasley was not pleased. Hermione gave Holly a huge hug, citing how "of course they couldn't expel you, it's all _clearly_ written in the legislation. I'm so glad Professor Dumbledore defended you though!" Ron gave her a handshake and said he was glad he wouldn't have to spend the school year alone with Hermione, to which she looked affronted, but also blushed. Holly would have to keep an eye on those two.

Sirius and Remus pulled her aside to congratulate her and Sirius gave her a significant look that they would talk later.

Bill Weasley was there, just back from a night shift at Gringotts, "Money never Sleeps" he stated wryly and gave her a hug. It caused Holly to blush bright red, Bill was a good looking bad boy, his fang earring and long hair were strangely appealing.

Their mirth was interrupted by Mad-Eye-Moody bursting in and pulled the older Weaskeys to the side, whispering that someone called Sturgis Podmore had been "found" guarding something at the Ministry and Dumbledore needed Tonks and Arthur on the scene for clean-up.

Mrs Weasley looked very worried and Holly caught glances at her from Sirius and Remus.

Whoever Sturgis Podmore was, it had something to do with her. Had he been guarding her during the trial?

Or...Holly had a strange feeling; he was meant to be guarding the _door_.

She felt a feeling of triumph that was not her own, her scar prickled, the locket burned.

Mrs Weasley put a slice of cake in from of her and a hand on her shoulder asking her if she was alright.

Holly saw and felt neither

Her mind was occupied in another place, watching another scene.

She heard maniacal laughter, felt a searing pain on her forehead and a rising feeling of elation.

_...Lucius's failure with Podmore had born unexpected fruit, there was another way in! He would achieve his desire, it would be his!_ _All he needed was..._

Holly didn't hear the gasps as she slumped out of her chair onto the floor, hand clutching her scar and writhing in pain.

Remus regained his senses first, rushing to pick Holly off the floor and attempt to rouse her.

Mrs Weasley ushered the children out quickly before enchanting the door closed.

"It's happening faster than Albus anticipated, send a Patronus! We need Severus!"

Remus and Sirius looked at each other, worry and fear in both their eyes, Mrs Weasley sobbed from beside them, stroking Holly's hair, shushing her like a child.

A silver doe arrived in the room in response to Remus's wolf.

Dark days were ahead.

...

**Authors Note: Hope you liked it, Please Read & Review. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine or real, otherwise I would have married Lupin :p **

**Authors Note: Hello all, I was a bit disheartened that no one reviewed the last chapter, but I won't let it set me back, even just one to say if you like it would be great!**

Chapter 7

Occlumency 

_Holly was in the Graveyard again, tied to the gravestone of Tom Riddle Senior. His son and murderer Voldemort paraded in front of her, making a show of her defeat to his Death Eaters. Cedric lay dead next to the cup, her only means of escape. She let him monologue, felt the pain of her release, standing on her broken leg to duel the monster before her. The wands connected, the bittersweet arrival of her parents, Cedric, phoenix song, she ran, touched the cup..._

_The corridor was dark, the door at the end ominous and alluring. It was the only way, they needed what was behind it, all the pain, and all the questions would be answered beyond it. The corridor was endless; any attempt to leave brought her back to the door. Someone was keeping her here. Tom wouldn't let her leave, they were bound, he was holding her, suffocating her, dragging her to the door, enforcing his will._

_After what seemed like an eternity she gave in, his grip lessened and he guided rather than pulled her towards the door. About to touch it, she felt someone else on the periphery of her mind and another presence in the corridor. Holly opened the door, behind it was not something new, but a memory far older. The Mirror of Erised stood before her, reflecting her mother, just as beautiful as she was in the graveyard, smiling at her sadly. _

"_Mum, I'm lost, I can't get out, Tom won't let me!"_

_The reflection smiled sadly and reached as if to touch her, but was not hindered by the glass. Lily Potter stepped from the mirror and walked to her daughter, cupping her face in her hands. _

"_Sweetheart, you need to wake up, don't let him win." _

_Holly felt a burning sensation in her eyes, a pain to match the one in her forehead. _

"_Mum...I don't know how...he's taking hold!"_

_The walls of the corridor seemed to shift, the floor shortening, the wallpaper ripping down and portraits crashing. _

_Lily Potter leaned forward and kissed her daughter on the forehead. She then looked over Holly's shoulder and smiled brightly as if seeing a loved one who had been gone for an age. _

"_It's time to go, I'll always be with you. You're a part of me. Go back with Sev, he'll lead the way."_

_Holly turned to see the pale face of Professor Snape who looked at her mother for the ghost she was and appeared terrified...guilty? Lily faded back into the mirror, but remained in view smiling sadly as Holly saw her reflections shoulder being grabbed by Snape and became blurry. All the time Holly focused on her Mother who clouded from view. _

Holly Potter woke up with a start on the kitchen table in Grimmauld Place. Sirius, Remus, Mrs Weasley and Professor Dumbledore were at her side and a pale and furious Professor Snape stared into her eyes.

Snape leaned back and shared a meaningful look with Dumbledore before walking to the corner of the room where a cauldron was boiling on the stove. Mrs Weasley enveloped Holly in a hug, practically sobbing. Once she was extricated Sirius looked her in the eyes before doing the same, but he did not let go.

Until she was held, Holly did not realise she was shaking. Wet droplets on her dress indicated she was crying.

Holly's scar burned in comparison to the cold that was smothering her body. Her skin felt numb and her limbs sluggish. As if they'd gone through such a great exertion they could no longer function. She was almost boneless, doll-like...a mannequin.

A sinister voice, the one that usually told Holly the harsh truth of situations, whispered that perhaps that was all she was, a puppet.

Sirius manoeuvred her off of the table and onto a chair by the fire; she stared at the bubbling cauldron, which was also being watched assiduously by Snape from across the room. It was almost hypnotic, simmering and changing hews, sending it's curling breath into the air and a strong odour of spice.

Holly allowed herself to remain entranced by it before she was interrupted by Snape appearing to stir the concoction and study its consistency. Holly watched his fluid motions as he stirred and conjured a vial before collecting some of the contents. He then turned to Holly and stated harshly:

"Drink Potter"

Holly didn't know why but she didn't think twice, taking the vial and shooting it down in one. If she'd looked at Professor Snape's face she would have seen surprise at her lack of resistance. Perhaps she was simply in a suggestible state, considering the circumstances.

Warmth spread out from her core to her extremities, breathing life back into them. Holly flexed her fingers experimentally, the feeling returning to them. Her scar still ached but it was like an aftershock, the remnants of her ordeal.

Holly wondered what potion Snape had given her and if she could get more of it to save, it was definitely making her feel better.

Professor Snape remained close by watching the affects of his concoction; seeming satisfied he swept over to Dumbledore and shared a few hushed words before he went back to the corner, looming there like a bat.

Sirius glared at Snape, a disgusted look upon his face, Snape glowered at him in reciprocation. Lupin remained inconspicuously between them, as if prepared to step in if thins became physical.

Dumbledore spoke first.

"Molly, perhaps you should check upon your young ones, I'm sure they'd like to know that Holly is awake and well. It would be best if they kept to their rooms for now, as she's still feeling out of sorts."

Molly looked hesitant to leave Holly, but acquiesced to Dumbledore's request, and with a wan smile at Holly bustled out of the door to her brood.

Dumbledore secured the door behind her slowly and with care, his slow movements belied his age. Holly had never really thought of Dumbledore as old, but looking at him now, with purple bags under his bespectacled eyes and a grave look upon his features you could see his 155 years of experience.

Sirius moved behind Holly to offer support, placing a hand upon her shoulder.

"Holly I know you have just been through a terrible ordeal, but I must ask of you what you have seen tonight."

Holly took a breath and had a bizarre moment of déjà vu, it seemed lately she had confessed much to Professor Dumbledore, without much reciprocation.

She recounted her revisitation of the graveyard and then her appearance in the corridor.

"I've been seeing that corridor for over a month now, I though maybe it was somewhere I had been when I was little, but I kept going there every night. At first I just ended up there and stood at the door, willing it to open. Then...then Voldemort started appearing to me, but not like he is now, Tom Riddle, he makes me walk down the corridor now. He tells me to open it, sometimes I see him and he's dragging me, or I feel him and it's like we're the same, and I can't control what I do. I though they were just nightmares until today, after my trial, when I saw it for myself. I couldn't stop myself today, I walked down it."

Dumbledore and Snape made a sharp movement, Sirius tightened his grip on her shoulder.

"I couldn't control my body, it felt like someone else was using it to walk there, I felt emotions that weren't my own, I touched the door, I opened it...then I heard Mr Weasley call my name and it felt like waking up, I closed the door and I left."

Dumbledore said nothing, he wanted her to continue, Snape said nothing about the omission of her Mother's presence in her vision.

"I know what it is now, It's the Department of Mysteries. Voldemort wants something badly in the Department of Mysteries, I overheard him talking to Lucius Malfoy, he's thought of a way to get it. I think it's me, he wants me to go in to get it for him, he's found a way to control me."

"I've started feeling out of control of my body when I'm awake, today I walked down the corridor, I touched the door, it opened for me, but it wasn't me who wanted to go.

Holly's voice was now shaking.

"Am I being possessed? Is this the same as with Ginny? He's making me do things isn't he? See things!"

Dumbledore addressed her again.

"The connection between yourself and Tom Riddle appears to have amplified considerably since his resurrection. His strongest feelings are projected into you, so you believe them your own. The same can be said for his thoughts, whether he is aware of this I cannot say, but it is clear that your mind is not safe. Lord Voldemort is an accomplished Legilimens, he can find his way into peoples thoughts, control what they see, find untruths."

"He can read minds?"

Snape scoffed from the corner, but a look from Dumbledore and Sirius prevented him fron continuing.

"In a way, Holly. Your connection to him appears to amplify his power, but adversely, you are venturing into his mind without even realising it, and crucially, Tom has not noticed yet. Fortunately, Professor Snape is an adept at Occlumency, the art of protecting the mind, you must learn Occlumency Holly, to protect your thoughts from Voldemort, for he is more dangerous within your mind than in the external world."

Holly balked at this last commandment, extra time with Snape?

But then she remembered back to her vision, how her Mother had smiled at Snape, told her to go with him, called him Sev...

She knew Snape had known her Dad, all to painfully. But had he known her mother too? Perhaps as more than acquaintances?

It occurred to her she had never heard Snape mention her mother, not one derogatory comment or reference.

For Snape who would use any ammunition to insult her in the public forum, to respect her mother's memory by ignoring it was significant.

She knew it was probably just a dream, but she had to find out.

Perhaps the horror of Occlumency could be put to other uses. If she was spending time with Snape then perhaps she could bring up the subject of her mother, a woman who general consensus agreed she was becoming more like day by day.

Holly had made her decision.

"When do I start these Occlumency lessons?"

Dumbledore seemed pleased with her compliance, he had yet to look her in the eye, but now at least Holly had some idea why.

If Voldemort was in her mind, perhaps when he discovered it he could see through her eyes. If he could read minds and Holly looked into Professor Dumbledore's, then he would be reading Dumbledore's mind.

The leader of the Order of the Phoenix and the only resistance to Voldemort could not be compromised in such a way.

Holly was a security risk to the order and to her own friends.

Holly felt like a criminal, sick to her stomach, and the full realisation of what was at stake came upon her.

She could unintentionally become a double agent.

"For now we must keep up appearances, you will come to Hogwarts with your classmates, but then we must find a reason for your out of hours visits to Professor Snape. Perhaps under the guise of Remedial Potions?"

There Holly had a better idea.

"Professor, people know that Professor Snape and I don't get along."

She looked at Snape and he sneered at her in agreement.

"It would be more believable if I was seeing him for a form of punishment rather than for extra lessons. My grades are good enough that remedial potions would not be necessary, and if I got the lessons and people who did worse than me didn't it would look suspicious. If people think that I'm unstable, and our animosity is known, If I insult Professor Snape infront of witnesses, or cause a scene in his class, then he would give me detention with him for as long as he wanted."

Snape looked mildly impressed by her deviousness. He waded in:

"I regretfully must agree with the girl, Albus. A public display of animosity would be far more likely than extra-curricular activity. Potter, at your _earliest convenience_ cause any scene you like. It is best I do not know what to allow for an appropriate response. I assure you it will be, _believable_."

Holly thought the world might indeed be ending, Professor Snape had basically complimented her scheme and agreed to participate.

If Snape and Holly were agreeing, it really was dooms day.

"It had better be a worthy display Potter."

With that Snape nodded to Dumbledore, sneered at a glaring Sirius and swept out the door gracefully.

If Snape had an animagus form, Holly would bet her life it was a bat.

Professor Dumbledore took his leave and after Sirius assured her that if Snape tried to take advantage of the situation he would rip him limb from limb. He then had an epiphany and left her with Lupin before appearing again with a square mirror about the size of an A5 book. He explained that it was a two-way mirror and he had a counterpart, he and James used them to talk in detentions. Sirius examined the size of it and then took out his wand and transfigured into a pretty pocket mirror.

"There, now it won't be so unusual if you have it out in the open, lots of girls have pocket mirrors, they'll just think you're vain little Faun."

With that he winked at her, hugged her and stepped aside as the young Weasley's and Hermione burst in to see her.

This was going to be a long year at Hogwarts.

**Authors Note: I hope you life it, please read and review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, if I did I'd be ridiculously rich. **

**Authors Note: Thanks so much for all of your reviews! Now we're getting ready to go to Hogwarts! **

Chapter 8 – Boggart

Mrs Weasley had told Mad Eye Moody a few weeks ago she would handle the Boggart, taking her at her word he left it alone. The Order had held a little "beginning of term" party last night. It consisted of Sirius acting slightly merrier than was necessary, almost in a false way, copious amounts of cake and butterbeer and Mrs Weasley chasing Fred and George around after they got hold of Sirius's Fire Whisky. It was a merry night for Holly until Mad-Eye pulled Holly aside and gave her the photograph he had shown her a few weeks ago. He told her to keep it and was about to say something else when a scream occurred from upstairs. Mrs Weasley had said she was going to handle the Boggart while she was in high-spirits, she was so proud that Ron was a Prefect and Holly was going back to school.

However, she had underestimated the strength of her own fears.

Mad-Eye and Holly ran upstairs to find Remus standing beside Molly as ashen white as she was. Lying on the floor, dead, was Ron. Except it couldn't be Ron, he was downstairs showing off his Prefect badge. Mrs Weasley, sobbing, raised her wand and stated:

"Ri...Ri..Riddikulus..."

The only effect was the Boggart changed into Fred and George, then Ginny and after Mrs Weasley's fourth attempt, into Holly.

Holly stared at her own lifeless body, eyes vacant, hair tousled and wild on the floor, skin pale. The uncanny moment left her feeling cold and Remus escorted Molly from the room seemingly unaware that Holly was walking closer to her corpse. Mad-Eye stood watching, as if interested to see the result.

Holly jumped back as the Boggart Holly moved, and mechanically stood, her eyes were not green but pale blue. Her smirk was cold, her skin deathly pale, if possible paler than the dead Holly had been. Her scar was bleeding, her red lips contrasting with her teeth so they looked almost bestial. Her blue eyes flashed red and the Boggart-Holly spoke.

"You think they can help you? They can't, you're too far gone. You're a danger to everyone around you, everything you love dies. They know it too, your_ friends. _You are a snake in the lions den, no matter what they do, you'll turn on them.

Boggart-Holly walked slowly towards her, the others in the room just as frozen as Holly. Boggart-Holly's hair began to recede into her scalp, she grew taller, her Hogwarts robes lengthening, her voice deepened, features hardened until it was not Holly anymore, but the young Tom Riddle.

"You think we're different, but we're the same. I live in you and no matter how you fight it, that stain will never come off. In the end, I'm going to win because if I don't take your life, I'm going to take your mind."

Holly stood frozen to the spot as he walked closer, he began to transform again, his robes lengthened, his eyes became cat-like and red, his nose flattened and his hair disappeared. Lord Voldemort stood in a side-drawing room in 12 Grimmauld Place and Holly could not move for fear.

It was then that Mad-Eye took action, flicking his wand and roaring Riddikulus causing Lord Voldemort to explode into dust particles.

Holly dropped onto the floor and Mad-Eye hobbled over, grabbed her by the arm and lifted her to her feet, spun her round and stared his real and magical eyes into her emerald green ones.

"Girl, no one else needs to know what we just saw. Our fears are private and they are just that, fears. A smart wizard accepts that terrible things are going to happen, and most likely to themselves or people they love. There is only one way to guarantee you are ready for them, CONSTANT VIGILANCE!"

Holly flinched at Mad-Eye's exclaimed ending.

"You never let your guard down, you trust your instincts and you suspect everyone. Your parents were good people, but they didn't learn that lesson and it got them killed. I'm tired of watching children die. So you make yourself ready, you be vigilant, and you do not let this bastard get to you!"

Holly let his words sink in and Mad-Eye tightened his grip before letting go.

"This is war Potter, people die, people are cowards and they turn on each other. You have to be above your fear, be a symbol for people to count on, if only on the outside. They want to see weakness, to justify their own, if you are a pillar of strength, then they feel strong too. Be a leader Potter, accept the bad will happen, but when spells are flying you can count on yourself to do the right thing, and others can count on you too."

Mad-Eye left the room and Holly had a lot to think about.

To be a leader was to give the appearance of stability, to show no fear, even if you were petrified inside. You had to accept the worst could happen, and prepare for it, always aware that you were an example to everyone else. She didn't want to be a leader, but it was becoming increasingly clear that this war wasn't just about her life, but everyone else involved. People, her friends, the Order, needed her to keep herself in check, to keep up a public front. She would deal with her issues on her own time, or on Snape's time. To show weakness at this time was to undermine her message.

Holly never wanted to be a leader, but if people, Dumbledore, her friends, the Order, insisted on her being one, she had better figure out how.

It seemed Mad-Eye knew this and was giving her the tools to do it.

...

Three days after her "seizure" and the night after the Boggart incident, Holly packed her trunk to return to Hogwarts. While she was relieved that she was able to go back at all this year, simultaneously she was worried about the reaction of the other students. The Daily Prophet's vitriol had been infecting theirs and their parents' minds all summer, they were bound to believe she was a lunatic.

If being accused of cheating to get into the Tri-Wizard wasn't bad enough, a smear campaign on her truthfulness and sanity would be even worse.

The best thing to do would be to not draw negative attention to herself, outbursts would only guarantee that people thought she was unstable.

Well, outbursts after the one with Snape, she was still planning what to do for that.

It would have to be outrageous to deserve a year in detention. But then again, even if it wasn't it wouldn't look too unusual for Snape to give out a disproportionate punishment; especially to her.

Closing the trunk she surveyed the nursery, now once again devoid of personality, and the other two trunks on Hermione and Ginny's beds. She felt the urge to leave something behind, to prove she'd been here and to give her a reason to come back. Holly never left any of her belongings at the Dursley's, it wasn't home to her, but this was. She opened her trunk and looked for something she wouldn't need and found some of the drawings she'd done of Hedwig when she was 11. It was sentimental and a non-essential item, she used some magi-tack to stick it to the wall above her bed. Now there was evidence she had been here, this was her part of the room.

She would have a room to be absent from.

Holly felt oddly better about leaving now, even if it was in a slightly morbid way. If she ever became the body of last night, she would leave something of her life behind

Holly left her trunk on her bed and walked down to the kitchen, one of the older members of the house would levitate them down the stairs.

She was greeted by Mrs Weasley screaming at Fred and George for nearly killing Ginny by knocking her down the stairs with a levitating trunk.

Holly was glad she wasn't on the receiving end of that tirade, although she could understand why Mrs Weasley was so frantic, considering the encounter with the Boggart last night.

Holly greeted Sirius in the kitchen, who seemed to have hidden from all the bustle, and was looking rather sober and sullen. Holly realised that their leaving would empty the house, he would be alone again.

She sat down next to him and gave him a little side hug, she didn't say anything. Sirius shifted and put his arm around her, pulling her in closer. They sat like that for a good 5 minutes before he took a deep breath and blew it out of his mouth.

Holly chose this time to speak.

"I won't be gone forever, I'll be back for Christmas, and I have the mirror, if you want to talk to me, or I need to contact you, we're only a word away. It won't be like last year, having to sneak into the Flu network systems."

Sirius still didn't say anything but his demeanour brightened a little.

"Besides, you promised to look into my family tree; it'd be nice to know more about the wizarding side of the family. I know the Potter's are an old family, but not much else. It looks like I won't be the only one with homework, I'm sure Remus will help you look into it if you ask him."

Sirius raised a sardonic smile not all that impressed with the idea of homework, but seemingly grateful someone had asked him to do _something._

He finally spoke.

"I'm coming to Kings Cross with you and the others, I want to see you off properly, I'll go as Padfoot but I want to be there. I've missed most of your Hogwarts experiences; I should have been there on your first trip."

Holly knew there was no talking him out of it, but Pettigrew was bound to have informed the Death Eaters of Sirius's animagus form.

"Pettigrew will have told them about Padfoot, if you're seen they'll know I'm with you in the summer. I know you're going to come no matter what I say, but we should take precautions. Is there a way to disguise what kind of dog you are? Or change your hair colour or something?"

Sirius looked inspired, grabbed his wand, and transfigured his hair pure white. He then grimaced and produced a red dog lead and collar. Holly interestedly picked up the collar; it even had a tag that read "Snuffles". Holly smirked at the little spiked studs on the collar; Sirius always had a certain flare.

Mrs Weasley called everyone to the door and when Holly looked back Sirius was now a pure white dog, looking quite like a short haired German-Shepherd. Holly put the collar on his offered neck and put the lead in her handbag, just in case a Muggle official took umbridge to a dog going without a lead in the train station. She double checked for her wand, money and the locket.

It was slightly cool outside so she did up the buttons on her cardigan, while Sirius ran onto the pavement and snapped happily at the pigeons. This must be his first piece of fresh air in months.

The journey to the station consisted of Tonks, Kingsly and Mrs Weasley loading everyone into a magically expanded car, much like the one Mr Weasley once owned. They reached Kings Cross in around 10 minutes, so Grimmauld Place must have been fairly central. The station was alive with commuter activity, the time was 10.45, 15 minutes to go before the train left. Sirius stayed close to Holly's side, as if guarding her, and his presence seemed to part the muggle crowd. Although his tongue was lolling his eyes and ears were alert, he was searching for trouble.

Once through the 9 ¾ barrier, Mrs Weasley hugged them all and the twins levitated their trunks onto the train. Lee Jordan complimented Holly on her dog and Holly noticed Lucius Malfoy in the crowd, luckily he had not heard. Sirius looked like he was gearing up to stand on his hind legs, and Holly knew such a motion would be suspicious. She headed him off by kneeling down and hugging him round the neck, whispering she would talk to him soon in his ear.

The time was now 10.59, the train would leave soon. Holly boarded the train with Ron, Hermione and Ginny. Fred and George went off with Lee Jordan and Ginny split off to find her group of friends. The train gave a lurch and steam was gushing out of the front, it began to move, students were waving at their loved ones and Sirius ran alongside the train until he disappeared from sight.

They were off to Hogwarts and Holly knew this year would not be easy.

Something wicked this way comes.

**Authors Note: Thanks for reading, please review!**

**Lady Extremely English Voldemort**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or his universe, if I did I would be really and truly filthy rich. **

**Author's Note: Sorry for the overlong hiatus, I have a really involved voluntary job (basically a full time job without the pay part). I also had severe writers block, but I've been re-reading Order of the Phoenix and now the spark of inspiration is back! Enjoy!**

**Chapter 9**

Holly had completely forgotten that Ron and Hermione would need to go the Prefect's carriage. So after a hasty goodbye she made her way down the aisle looking for an empty seat. Most of the booths were filled already, Holly walked past them swiftly, and she could already hear the shocked gasps and see the pointing fingers in her peripheral vision. Even having peripheral vision was strange. It felt like an eternity before she reached the end of the train where a very awkward looking Neville sat opposite a girl with her face covered by a magazine. Holly was startled to see it was upside down, and could make out it was called "The Quibbler". Neville seemed relieved to see her, and she felt the same, even going so far as to hug him, which made him blush to his ears.

Holly had always liked Neville; he was such a naturally _good_ person. Sweet, generous, she'd always be grateful for the Gillyweed he suggested during the Tri-Wizard. She'd gone to the Yule Ball with him last year, and though he'd stepped on her toes a few times, they'd had a decent time. It wasn't at all romantic, just two friends having a night out, and they'd ended up talking about Quidditch and Chocolate Frog Cards. Neville had no predisposition to judge; even though she was famous he never treated her differently. Especially now after the summer of the smear campaign he was chatting to her amiably, as if nothing had happened. Holly didn't speak much, just enjoyed listening to Neville talk about the plants he had discovered over the summer, including a strange moving Cactus he said was a "Mimbelus Mimbletonia". It was rather cute. He offered to show her its defence mechanism but she declined.

The girl opposite still had her magazine glued to her face, Hermione would probably have considered it rude, but Holly thought she may be shy. After two hours the food cart came around and still Ron and Hermione had not arrived. Holly got herself a pumpkin pasty and a chocolate frog as well as an assortment of sweets, she didn't know if Ron would get a chance to use the cart. Neville settled for a cauldron cake, the pale blond girl opposite didn't move, still hypnotised by her magazine. The only reason Holly knew she wasn't body bound was she flicked the page occasionally. Holly and Neville chatted about Quidditch, classes, careers, anything and everything. It was another hour before Ron and Hermione arrived.

"Oh hello Neville! So sorry we took so long Holly, this year's Head Boy and Girl take their duties very seriously. They gave us a very thorough briefing."

"Yeah", said Ron "It was dead boring, has the food cart been?"

Holly presented Ron with her sweet assortment, he murmured thanks through a mouthful of fizzing whizzbies. Hermione took the seat next to Holly and Neville but Ron had to sit on the magazine girl's side. He didn't look very comfortable and shot occasional furtive glances her way. After another half an hour Ginny came into the compartment to visit, and to hand Ron his corned beef sandwich.

"I know you won't eat it but Mum said to give this to you. Hello Luna, how was your summer?"

The platinum blond girl lowered her paper to reveal she was wearing a pair of off paper spectacles. Holly couldn't help noticing the eyes behind were large and blue, and she wore a pair of turnips for earrings and a necklace of butterbeer corks. She found she rather liked the necklace.

"Oh" she said, as if she only just noticed she was in a booth full of people "Hello Ginerva. Yes it was quite good, Daddy and I went searching for the Crumple Horned Snorkack, we think we've found some genuine evidence."

"That's great. Everyone, this is Luna Lovegood, she's in my year but in Ravenclaw. Luna, this is my brother Ron, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom and Holly Potter, they're in the year above us."

Luna's eyes fixed on Holly and she said "You're Holly Potter."

"Yes" Holly answered, waiting for the tirade of abuse she thought was to come.

"You went into the Lake last year."

Holly didn't know where this was going "Yes I did..."

"Then you must have seen the Merpeople's Undewater Mithril Mine."

There was a stunned silence.

"Mine?"

"Oh yes, the Ministry's Beast Control Department forces the Merpeople to mine for mithril so they can bribe the Goblin's at Gringotts, otherwise they will be rounded up and tagged."

Hermione scoffed "Oh that's complete rubbish. I think we'd have noticed if the Merpeople had been enslaved by the Ministry. Also, there is no such thing as a Crumple Horned Snorkack! But no wonder you believe all that tosh, reading a conspiracy rag like The Quibbler."

"Actually, my father is the Editor" Luna said coolly.

Hermione blushed, her tongue had gotten her into trouble "Oh."

Holly decided to answer the question.

"I'm sorry Luna, I was pretty focused on finding Ron last year, I didn't have much of a chance to look around. For all I know there could have been mines down there."

Hermione glared at her, but Holly was more willing to admit the possibility of the impossible than Hermione.

"Oh that's alright Holly" she said, brightening "I plan to go looking myself this year, there is plenty of Gillyweed growing in the lake."

The blank look on Neville's face cleared at the mention of the plant.

"Gillyweed? Do you like herbology? I've got a Mimbelus Mimbletonia here my Uncle got me..."

Surprisingly, Luna and Neville began to chat between themselves about Herbology, and the experimental plants her father bred, including something called "Dirigible Plums". It was as if there was no one else in the carriage.

It began to get dark and Ron and Neville left the carriage for the toilets to allow the girls to change into their robes. The lights of Hogwarts appeared in the distance and suddenly a knot that had been in Holly's stomach since the trial loosened. She was home, a part of her had felt like she would blink and be back in that courtroom, watching her wand get snapped and being sent back to the Dursley's forever.

They filed out of the train as it reached Hogwarts and Holly noticed that there was no sign of Hagrid, instead, Professor Vector was there herding the first years into the boats. The older students walked towards the carriages with the invisible horses, except, they weren't invisible anymore. Black skeletal horses with leathery wings now occupied the bridles, with frightening glowing eyes.

"What are those?!" she said, her voice unsteady.

"What are what Holly? There's nothing there?" said Hermione, looking at her with a worried expression.

"The weird horses at the front of the carriages!" Holly exclaimed, pointing right at them.

"We don't see anything mate, are you feeling alright?" asked Ron, a frown on his forehead.

Holly felt like ice, was she going mad?

"Don't worry, you're not mad, I can see them too."

Holly looked over at Luna who for some reason had Ron's own Pigwidgeon on her shoulder.

"You can?"

"Yes, I've always been able to see them. You're just as sane as I am" she said, smiling dreamily before stepping into the carriage.

Holly hesitated and then followed.

**Author's Note: Hope you liked it, please read and review! **


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